Saturday, April 18, 2009
My brother flew in from LA Thursday for a twice postponed visit. I picked him up at DFW at 3:45, my DD arrived back from a business trip at 5:00, and my sister returned from Geneva following an 8-day visit with a son at 6:00. I am rarely more than a few miles from home. But not the reason for the post. My parents are 82 and 84. Dad had to take Mother to the ER in the middle of the night with a severe headache. Fearing a stroke, she had a CAT scan. Not this time, however they did find evidence she has had one in the past. We don't know when. At least my brother, who being so far away is all but completely insulated from the day-to-day aging and mounting infirmatives of our parents, was the one there to help them this time. Mom's condition continues to get worse. She was always the rock of the family and the glue that kept us together. It is so upsetting to watch her age and grow unable to do the things she's always loved. She's had such a hard 18 months with several broken vertebra and several surgeries. The trauma of repeated surgeries over a 10-month period alone has caused part of this. Though her short term memory suffers more and more, we've seen nothing that would generally indicate a stroke. She's the one person in the family we expected to be going strong well into her 90's. I've been counting on that. Instead, my Dad insists that he can care for her by himself, but that is wearing him down as well. I don't want this to happen. I want them to be the strong, loving and generous parents I've known all my life. I know it is inevitable, but I don't want it to really ever be. I am not ready for it, and I am very sad and very upset.
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